Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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