If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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