Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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