if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize