Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
