why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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