I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
