My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
