so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
