So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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