Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
