as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
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