there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
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