quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
