let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
