Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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