I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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