and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
