I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
This beer is not sobering me up at all
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
