i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
