just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
