If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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