Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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