I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I'm really busy with my period
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