Are we in a gay sports bar?
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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