READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
