Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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