I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Will exercising make me less horny?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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