After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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