I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize