I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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