I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
