So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
