And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
Randomize
