so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
