She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
