nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
