Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Randomize
