Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
