Me. At least after what I've been through.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
