your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
