I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
