Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
