found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Randomize
