I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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