He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I believe in your delicious
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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