THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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