dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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