i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
