My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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