You really coming over, don't trick.
I accidentally had phone sex last night
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
